PRE-ORDER NOW!
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PRE-ORDER NOW! 〰️
FREE SPEECH HAS TAKEN A HIT. IT’S TIME TO HIT BACK.
Good grief. How did we even get here? Probably because an infantile, goose-stepping billionaire is performing a slow-motion coup on the United States. And since we can't challenge him to a fight (or did I just do that?), we thought we'd have some fun at the expense of an individual who cries freedom of speech while simultaneously having skin thinner than a DJT alibi.
Is this low-brow and petty? You bet your broligarch ass it is.
But it's all in the name of personal catharsis and an attempt to raise money for the ACLU.
That's right. $5.00 of every purchase not only goes to the ACLU, but you’re now almost certainly living rent-free in what's left of Twittler's ketamine-soaked synapses. Tough to say which of those is more rewarding. Oh, we also thought it was worth mentioning that each of these is hand-made in a female/minority owned business, so your effigy may vary slightly (although given what we’ve seen online, it seems like ours may have better build quality than the real thing).
So pretty please – Order as many of these limited-edition goodies as possible. Grab a bat, a broomstick, or whatever tickles your revenge bone and take out some good old-fashioned legal hostility. Your Uncle Sam thanks you.
Unfortunately, we have to charge for shipping. Flat fee of $12.00 Anywhere in USA.
Questions?
The CYBERSCHMUCK is currently a pre-order item only (we didn’t make thousands of them yet). AVAILABLE TO SHIP JUNE 4, 2025!
